Her vocabulary was as bad as, like, whatever.

I found this at The Manbottle Library. I picked out a few of my favorites, go to the link to see the whole list.

Every year, English teachers from across the country can submit their collections of actual similes and metaphors found in high school essays. These excerpts are published each year to the amusement of teachers across the country. Here are last year's winners:

• Her face was a perfect oval, like a circle that had its two sides gently compressed by a thigh Master.
• She had a deep, throaty, genuine laugh, like that sound a dog makes just before it throws up.
• The little boat gently drifted across the pond exactly the way a bowling ball wouldn't.
• McBride fell 12 stories, hitting the pavement like a Hefty bag filled with vegetable soup.
• The plan was simple, like my brother-in-law Phil. But unlike Phil, this plan just might work.